This Diwali weekend, it drizzled, rained and then for some good measure,poured.
The folks in 'power' must've mused that the lamps shall lighten up the moonless night anyways, why not save on electricity. Brilliant!! And then the cablewallah had some DIY fixes for why the channels were either blacked out or grainy.
So when the two finally come together, I find myself unwinding in front of the ibox and ended up being all wound up.(Not just with what will follow in the post but broadly on the state of affairs of the television as a medium of mass entertainment in our country.)
Back on track and to be specific, caught the "It" & 'waiting-in-the-shadows' couple from the first family of Bollywood on KJo's show over Upma (well. ...it was dinner time) and am glad it wasnt my coffee time else I would have wanted to spill it all over Annoyingly Ridiculous Bahu (read Aishwarya Rai Bacchan).
For reasons and logic best known to KJo he ropes in Ash and AB baby to open the 3rd season of his popular talk show.
And its dark.
Actually their respectiver designers, stayed conservative by dressing all 3 in black.For Ash, it's justified- she does look plump so saves the day for her. Yeah yeah, its unfair, the pressures of looking good all the time but hey, since when does the crown rests lightly.
The studio included could have done up with more colors and with lot more panache.
And its irritating.
Actually it's Ash. She giggles endlessly. Plus, she needs to be reminded she is on Karan's show not Cannes Press conference. The accent + giggles only makes you wish she zips the lips. It only lends more credit to the claims of all those who call you Ice-maiden and fake .
She is a pretty sight, anytime.Drool factor. Still packs a punch at 37.
And its lukewarm.
Actually it's Junior B. He chose to remain on the fence. Diplomacy was his mantra. While Ash ventured to couple of bold statement which were very unlike her previous apperances on the show.
Sample this:
K Jo: Do you like being in the eye of the storm?
ARB:My name is not Khan.
Get a life honey. Your man can't do in a lifetime what the Khan Triumvirate can in a single release- Whip up a frenzy. I don't deny it was a dumb question (read for blonde's) in the first place, who does? From where you stand maybe no publicity is better than negative publicity but if it works for others, you neednt pontificate or sit on judgement. By making statements like these you are doing exactly that- more publicity.
K Jo: X, Y Z who is the actor for all seasons? (Btw,Bacchan's werent amongst the options)
ARB: It's the Bacchans for all seasons.
Now, lady,that sounds stupidly eccentric, weirdly self-obsessed and an pompous ***
K Jo: Who wont be on your party guest list?
ARB: All those who are on your's.
Its common knowledge that most of it is of your own doing. Why drag K Jo's camp into this?
Tactless. Tch-Tch!
K Jo: Who would be the only persson you would like to be stranded with on an island?
ARB:Mallika Sherawat. Then AB baby will come running for her but lead him to me.
Sic.Sic.The way she mouthed the name and contoured her face she might as well have spat.
Glad Jr B won the hamper.Much ado bout nothing. The hamper I mean.
It was amusing to hear ARB say she doesnt like the girl talks on bags and shoes and compliments when she talks/walks/breathes/ exudes ultra feminity on and off screen.I mean come off it. The elaborate elegant, prim proper act you put on 24/7 speaks an entirely different language altogether and then you say you have a thing against it. If you are a 'buddy'- like one among the boys -as the hubby says, then you truly are one helluva actress.
As for wittiness She had this to say in her rapid fire Q & A;
K Jo: Can you pass a mirror without looking at it?
ARB: Yeah. Why upset the mirror?
Found that pretty Duh huh!!!! Add to this the million times K Jo parroted " the most beauitful woman on earth" , its an over kill. Even for a beauty of Ash's calibre it sure was.
The 1 min 'sing ode for the couple' videos of tinseltown brethren added nothing of value. Considering no one will , ever, admit on camera how brilliant papa is, how beautiful wife is, how talented mom is but beta bacchan is no where in the race. He is a prankster, fun to work with, brings so much energy to work and is a live wire. And yes the smile and eyes. I mean the man is a legend. Despite the track record, he actually has directors/ producers wanting to work with him. Plus a natural multipurpose. great eye candy for shutter bugs to go tizzy over+ decent enough hanger for trophy, picture perfect, 10/10 better half.
For Jr. B its a forever battle, not to beat the race but to even be in the race.Wicked.Lol!
While baby B acknowledged that " wife is always right" it was a natural progression to see the wifey devour the first episode. Ash beat Rani (rumored) and Karisma (fact) to him and still considered the one who got the raw deal between the two. (Ok, only for a moment forget that she bagged the Bacchan surname). Not that the sidey ' prince' or the eternal bad boy with a heart of gold ' being human' would make an difference. She is indeed a star in her own right and has earned it. But blowing your own trumpet, give us a break!! If your arent Khan and meant that as a sacrcasm isnt it ironic you are doing just that.
Trivia:Bacchans arent , really, Bacchans. It was Sr.B's poet daddy's adopted pen name.
The couple doesnt have the sharp humor meets style diva of an SRK-Gauri ;baritone meets grace of an Amitabh-Jaya, or Fun meets more fun of a Rishi-Neetu pairing, but they work magic anyways. Lest one thinks I am an Ash-Abhi fan, note I said Magic. If one interprets magic as something that science cannot sufficiently explain i.e, no logic to speak , then yes the couple do have a magic they rub off on people, the surname notwithstanding.
Wasn't quite the flag off one would expect. Next week has Ranbir 'rocking' Kapoor and Imran 'impish' Khan on the couch, spoofing a 'dostana' kodak moment. The advert for it promises a fun ride , so looking forward to the youth brigade of B town making more of a splash and Oomph!
Why the O?
You shall know.
Next week.
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